Hey there, friends. It has been a hot minute since I updated this blog, and for that I can only say, “life happens.” But I have some MAJOR updates regarding my post from 2017, “The Details in the DNA” that I thought were share-worthy!
- I tested through Ancestry, just to cover all my bases.
- I FINALLY got some close family matches! Through those matches, I was able to find my birth mother’s family.
- My birth mother didn’t want to talk to me (still doesn’t, and that’s ok. It’s her choice.) She’s got a lot of emotional baggage re: the adoption and her following life choices, and it’s going to take a while to sort through it all. Maybe she never will, I don’t know. I just know I’m here if and when she ever decides to reach out.
- I have a little brother via her, and he is marvelous. I’m still getting to know him; I was a bit of a bombshell to him as he grew up believing he was an only child. Surprise, kiddo! We have so much in common though, it’s pretty obvious we are related.
- Her mother, my grandmother, is wonderful. We have a lot in common, too, and I think it’s safe to say we’ve bonded quite well.
- After months of analyzing, a few more miracle DNA matches, and the meticulous building of a tree with the help of some friends, I found my birth father’s family. As I suspected, it was “some white dude out there who had no idea I even existed.” This surprising reunion could have gone one of two ways, and it went SO WELL. The family has embraced me, and I couldn’t be more thankful. They are wonderful, kind-hearted people who care deeply about family. We are just waiting on a final DNA test to confirm everything (but we are all 99.9% sure, because DNA doesn’t lie, and I look very similar to his other daughter, and then one of my cousins looks JUST like my daughter!). So if this is all 100% confirmed, that means I have a little sister!
- I have been getting Christmas cards in the mail from my bio fam, including my paternal grandparents, my maternal grandma, and an aunt. I’ve cried over each one, the happiest of tears.
- My parents have been SO SUPPORTIVE of my search for my biological family, and they have been right there cheering me on as I approach these reunions. They truly are the best.
All in all, I’d say my search was a success. It has had mostly happy reunions, from immediate to extended family, with the one exception. I can’t even begin to express my gratitude for that, and for the technology that allowed these reunions to be possible. As a child, I dreamt of finding my biological roots, and finding the answers to my history. Now I have them, and SO MUCH makes sense, where it was just a jumble before. I’m hoping 2019 brings me the opportunity to physically embrace some of these family members in person, which has always been another dream of mine.
We lost almost 30 years together, but now we can make up for lost time and build relationships going forward. I can’t wait.